Crud - Marina Miller's Blog

Little Sister

Marina — Sat, 03 Sep 2011 19:10:16 +0000

Your worst enemy, and your best friend. There are so any words to explain what a little sister means to me. It means in my case, fighting routinely, sometimes viciously. But you also always have someone to play with, and tell all of your deepest darkest secrets. When you are sad, happy, angry, and everything in between, even though she might not care on the outside, you are all your little sister can think about in your time of need of attention. I am fortunate enough to have a normal, and good relationship with my sister, which I think makes me very lucky, because some of you may be thinking about the way you and your sibling(s) cooperate, and it may not be at nice as you want it to be… In any case though, your, my little sister will always be there when I really need her, and I thank her for that. Love you sis. <3

Untitled

Marina — Sat, 20 Aug 2011 23:42:32 +0000

After my dad passed away this May of Colorectal Cancer, there were so many new feelings and realizations I have confronted. And just today, I am figuring out fully that it will never heal completely, the pain, the grief, and the what seems like endless moments of sadness. But it will get better over time, just when you think you are over it, a birthday or holiday comes up, and all you can think of is, “the first one without him…” Little things like Father’s day, his birthday, and yesterday, my parent’s wedding anniversary sneak up on you and at first all they want to do is hurt you.. Though later on in the day or week or month, there are some, but not many happy feelings about that dreadful day and memories behind it you make seem bad.
That’s another thing, and it is a horrible thing too, that most memories I think of with Dad in them, I am 95% sad. I mean, shouldn’t these memories be cheering me up??? Well, I guess not. I have not bothered going to any therapists or reading any health books that were offered to me, because the great relationship I have with my family is like a 24/7 therapy session. Constant talk and helpful answers to my questions. Sometimes while talking to my friends, I have questions about their summers, their weekends, and their well, lives. And they say “I don’t know” to the most normal things I know about my life. My point is, I am recently noticing some families have very minimal communication between themselves. It is sad really, because say you are a growing teen like me, and you have some embarrassing question about boys or puberty, stuff like that. Some kids don’t have the skills, or I should rather say the urge to simply talk with their family. Maybe it is just me, but maybe less talking is normal my family talks too much, but no, to me no, communication is extremely HEALTHY!
Anyways, I feel privileged to have a family as great as I do, in what some people are telling me is the hardest and most horrible thing that will ever happen to me in my life. And I am glad and sad at the same time I can relate to others who have lost a loved one. I hope I grow up to be as accomplished, smart and loving as my dad was. I love you Dad…

Infinite Worries

Marina — Wed, 17 Aug 2011 18:37:31 +0000

I am always trying to acknowledge my worries about soon to begin high school, but I am worrying about so many things, I forgot about just one… Math. Now in the past I have made myself think I am worse at this evil subject then my report card told me I am. I think this is because I am the type of person to over exaggerate things in my head but later on, realize it was no sweat. Well, now my biggest math adventure is yet to come. WEll, I wouldn’t call it an adventure, I would call it an expected, socially awkward NIGHTMARE. I had almost completely put aside my worries and told myself grade 8 math won’t be so bad, but today an unfortunate and utterly annoying reminder that summer really DOES suck the smarts out of you was sitting right in front of me.

I opened one of my notebooks recently bought for me, so it was known I was using it often. I opened to the next free page to write in it, and what lays there for me to find you ask? Math, math math MATH! I was told as a child not to be aggressive when angry, but to use my words, preferably write it down. So, I am writing it down now. MY DAY WAS COMPLETELY RUINED! All thanks to one I shall not name, integers, fractions, and algebra…
As I would home alone, I burst in to tears of fear, scared to death by the fact school starts in 2 weeks, and I don’t remember a thing. Yeah sure, you can get away from forgetting your un, trois, sis, and your eska jupu aller o twalette, (all spelt by my pronunciation.) But I doubt in the right circumstances can you get away without embarrassment, forgetting your basic 1 2 3′s (not literally.)

Well, I wrote it down, happy? I am to worried about math to care…

Vacations may be good, but here is better.

Marina — Sat, 13 Aug 2011 21:23:45 +0000

I loved being on vacation last month in the Caribbean. It was so amazing, but after say, 5 days, I started to miss the rain over in Vancouver! Going the farthest away from home I have ever been in my life, made me love my city even more. I have found myself being comforted by the Vancouver ocean, the bridges, the trees and the weather, If I need peace, all I need to do is sit on a park bench and breath in the moderately cool air. This is where I am meant to be, and I am so happy for it. I know why they call it the best place on Earth, because it is, to me.

Changing Your Perspective…

Marina — Fri, 12 Aug 2011 21:10:26 +0000

A few months ago, when Paul McCartney performed as Saturday Night Live’s musical guest, he sung a song originally performed by John, “A Day in the Life.” My dad told me that he cried while watching this. I was surprised, but now I realize that when the song comes on my iPod, I do feel sad. It may be because it makes me think of my dad, but it may be plainly a sad song. I don’t know anymore. Not that this song is significantly special to everyone, but to me it has become that. Actually, any sad-toned Beatles song makes me feel 2x gloomier than I would of been, because all I see is my dad crying at the television while listening, and I see his love for the Beatles maybe stronger than mine. Another thought I have, is the Beatles did something even more amazing than make you sad with their music, they could make you express every emotion, all in one song. And “A Day in the Life,” is a great example, because even though by the end of the song I am tearing up, I realize they are tears of joy, of happiness, tears that help me get the emotions I keep bottled up…. out.

Its Never too Late to Start Over… Again

Marina — Mon, 08 Aug 2011 00:47:09 +0000

Very often I get EXTREMELY bored of writing on my blog, and I just feel it isn’t worth it, but recently many people have been bringing it up. “Hey Marina, I haven’t seen you writing on your blog very recently,” or, “Hey Marina, I would love to see you writing more on your blog, I miss it!!!.” Whatever. But I have taken those “helpful” words and turned them into these. K, I mean, okay. (I have really been living on text talk for like, ever, with facebook on my tiny phone keyboard and everything I don’t have time to write in real english.) Anyways, updates on me, well you know the bad stuff, and you may know the good stuff. Like, I just graduated elementary school, and the thought of soon approaching high school scared the BEJESUS out of me. Pardon my German, yeah, I think that’s the phrase. Also, Lucy got groomed yesterday. Yeeeah, you didn’t need to know that. Sorry for ruining the last 5 seconds of your day. The End. (Wait, I take that back, they taught us in writing it is cheesy to say “The End”)

Stereotype:MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!

Marina — Fri, 24 Dec 2010 21:28:11 +0000

I know I am doing the stereotypical thing in writing one of the millions of “Merry Christmas, Hanukkah, Kwanzaa, Blah Blah Blah,” blog posts. But too bad, I am doing it. Though to make it different from the others, you can call it a Merry Christmas post and a “my life” update.
Man, how do you indent on this thing??? To some people that might sound stupid but to me all I can do is click 6 spaces at the beginning of each paragraph.
123456 This year in Grade 7, I have taken on the Leadership committee. It is fun and all but all I get to do in my group is plan a dance every once and a while. All I am really leading right now is:

For loot bags:
-Candy, Gum, Lollipops
-Pencil or Pen
-Party Noisemakers
-Note Pad
-A Balloon
20 regular, 1 large prize.

Impressive, right? Yeah…I thought so.
I just think I can do more for the school, ya know?

Well, moving on, MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I at this moment am still getting prepared for my favorite part of today, and the year. In past years I may have told you about the big Miller-Morel clash annual X-mas party. But for new readers/fans of my blog, It is just a big awesome party.
What? Don’t blame me for not wanting to explain it all on the busiest day of the year.

So….
MARINA OUT!

It all started with a big bang….BANG!

Marina — Mon, 11 Oct 2010 20:07:32 +0000

I just recently got into this new show called “The Big Bang Theory.” Most of you have either heard of it, or are addicted to it like me! It is this sit-com about the funny experiences of a group of super-genius friends who live across the hall from an average blonde haired aspiring actress.
The way they bring all of those personalities and habits together keep bringing you back for more!!! I have gone through two seasons in about two weeks!
you should really try it.

Happy pie day!

Marina — Mon, 11 Oct 2010 19:52:35 +0000

Wait… Thanksgiving isn’t just about pie… Or is it?

Now that you ask…yes it was great

Marina — Tue, 27 Jul 2010 19:53:30 +0000

Yesterday at about 11:30 PM I got home from the airport. As some of you may know, my trip to Disneyland Parks in California took place all last week. Monday to Monday.
you can get a link to some of the photos on my dad’s facebook account at penmachine.com